


Guilty Conscience

by gwenpoole



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-24
Updated: 2019-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:15:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21927304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gwenpoole/pseuds/gwenpoole
Summary: Part of the Irondad Secret Santa for 2019This piece is dedicated to @goldenavenger02 on Tumblr, Merry Christmas!Morgan and Peter end up ill a few days before christmas and Tony begins to stress over it, Peter has a nightmare and Tony comforts him.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 6
Collections: Iron Dad Secret Santa 2019





	Guilty Conscience

**Author's Note:**

  * For [GoldenAvenger02](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoldenAvenger02/gifts).



> Hey! I had a lot of things come up (Surgery dates, physiotherapy and mainly just medical stuff) so it's a bit rushed but I hope it's satisfying enough! Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah and everyone have an amazing New Year!!

Tony sighed gently, picking up the fever medicine as he poured out the correct measurements. His arm shook, causing the medicine to spill slightly before he looked over and smiled at Peter slightly, handing over the medicine. “It’s strong, I still can’t believe you managed to get this sick out of a snow day.” Tony complained.  
Peter laughed but it quickly dissipated into a cough, Tony carefully held a hand to Peter’s forehead and sighed “Promise me you won’t decide it’s a smart idea to bury yourself in snow again. No matter your super enhanced abilities. You’re no Captain America kid.”   
Tony’s concern was mainly lying in the fact that these two kids thought it would be a smart idea to bury each other in the snow, Harley somehow managing to avoid the fever despite being a main culprit. If Tony could, he would’ve already chased Harley but Tony wasn’t exactly in the greatest position to chase after pain in the ass children.  
“How’s Morgan doing?” Peter asked before downing the cough medicine, making a irritated expression, sticking out his tongue and causing the other to laugh slightly.  
“She’s with your mum, she’s doing just fine Peter. A lot better than you anyway. Healing powers my ass.” Tony commented, bringing the blanket further up so it’s tucked beneath the others chin, Peter went to push it away in protest but Tony caught him. “Don’t even try smartass, just try to get some sleep.”  
He stood up, groaning slightly, using his good arm to carefully push back Peter’s hair to stop it from sticking to his forehead “Night Peter, you spider menace.” His father commented before leaving.  
Outside Peter’s room Tony stood for a moment, his hand sitting on the door knob as he shook his head slightly, Pepper walking past but stopping to kiss Tony’s cheek “Morgan finally fell asleep no thanks to you, how’s Peter?” The female asked a soft smile as she pulled away Tony’s injured arm from the door gently as possible.  
She paused looking at his expression, one of concern “Tony… He’s going to be fine, you got to stop stressing. It’s okay.”   
Tony glanced at Pepper and sighed “But Pep, what about-“  
Pepper gave him a look that caused him to go quiet “Europe was not your fault Tony, it was out of your control. No one knew Quentin was going to go crazy and Peter can handle himself. You’re babying him more than Morgan and she’s five.”  
Her hand reaches up to Tony’s face, carefully running along his stubbled cheek, finally the male conceded, his hand dropping from the knob. His head leaned in slightly to Pepper’s touch and he sighs “I just worry Pep, he’s… He’s already been through so much more than any teen should’ve. It isn’t fair.”   
“I know.” She whispered, her hand falling to his shoulder with a slightly hurt expression “What we can do is get something hot to drink and go to sleep Tony, you need it, you know what the doctor said. I’m not going to be responsible for explaining why my husband got so sick he had to be readmitted into the hospital when he worked so hard to be home for Christmas.”  
Tony laughed gently at that and a shaky hand, scarred and mangled reached over to squeeze Pepper’s hand, but even the squeeze felt more like just a touch, too soft to be barely be considered comfort, Pepper took lead and ran a thumb affectionally across his hand as Tony smiled at her before finally walking away from the bedroom. Leaving Peter alone and Morgan in the room across to sleep gently.  
Peter’s head felt like a balloon full of led, his nose completely useless as he breathed through his mouth, it felt like a weight on hi chest constantly, Peter was really wondering if he’d ever actually fall asleep. And he was wondering that until he did finally fall into a restless sleep.  
There was so much on his mind, it was only five months ago Peter had gone to Europe, constant stressing over his dad while he was still in hospital, Ned and MJ had to calm him down and make sure he didn’t panic on one too many occasions. Then there was the problem with Quentin. By the end Peter felt as if the world had tumbled squarely on his shoulders and he was just barely holding it up.   
It was a frantic dream, he sat up, looking into the void as a green smoke swirled around his feet, creaking and twisting trees slowly emerged from the ground and Peter felt uneasy. That constant weight followed him as he began to walk across the seemingly infinite plain.  
“Hello?” Peter questioned throughout the void before coming to an abrupt stop with a large ‘pang’ as he bumped into thick glass, he pressed his palms against it. The weight seemed to feel like dread now.   
“Peter…” The voice seemed to come from everywhere all at once and pressed up against Peter, tsking and taking away his breath. The voice seemed to be right next to his neck, sending chills down his spine while at the same time booming from above.  
“Why did you kill me?” The voice asked, sounding like a million smaller voices while still being loud enough for Peter to press hands against his ears, his eyes squeezing shut as the ground shook, the feeling of going up, someone standing up and beginning to walk.   
“I didn’t, I didn’t kill you. I didn’t kill you.” Peter repeated as he felt shoulders shove past him, tossing the teen in all directions. His breathing was uneven, and everything was shaking, his world moving around until he fell onto the ground, the figures trampling across him.  
“Then how come I’m dead? Why did you do it Peter? Was it fun for you? Did you find some sick entertainment from lodging that bullet in my head?”   
“No of course not, of course not. But you needed to be- to be…”   
“What Parker? Stopped? Am I a villain to you? All I wanted was to be an inspiration, to help others and give them hope when your lousy dad can’t even do that. Wouldn’t you rather he did die?”  
Peter stood back up, only for a rotting figure to push him back, the glass bowl had been smashed in and it moved with a zombie like consistency. It all felt so real to the point Peter was sure he was going insane.  
“You can’t stop me, I can’t die because you will never let this fall from your conscience. I’m an infestation Peter. Physically I might be gone but I’m still here in your head-“   
Peter’s fist swung at the figure, a scream ripping from his throat, he felt like he was being held down, he was drowning. He was being drowned, he was going to die.  
“Peter? Peter! Peter calm down, he buddy, underoos, it was just a dream.” Tony had bolted to Peter’s room, trying to wake the panicking teen until a fist swung, punching Tony in the shoulder and he groaned slightly as the teen’s eyes flew open wildly.  
“Quentin? Quentin. Get away, get away from me…” Peter’s eyes scanned the room until they fell on his dad who was holding his bad shoulder with his good arm and suddenly, he felt that guilt again. “Dad… Oh god I’m- I’m sorry I didn’t mean to wake you.”   
Tony’s heart had splintered hearing that god forbidden name, he was right to worry “No, no don’t worry it’s fine. I get it kid. I know what it’s like.” Tony reassured, looking at the teen who had picked up a tissue to blow his nose.   
“No you don’t Tony.” He muttered, his eyes downcast as he tossed the used tissue in the general direction of the bin. He had hurt him without meaning to, he was a horrible person. What if he killed his dad? Just like he had killed Quentin.   
That wasn’t his fault though. Or was it? The lines got so easily blurred and smudged, Peter was unsure of everything.  
“I do get it, actually.” Tony replied, a raised eyebrow as he looked at the other, Peter finally looked up with a confused expression, incentive for Tony to continue. “I do actually get what you’re going through Peter… I’ve been there, done that. I’m still doing it.”  
Tony paused to search for the right words as his hand fell to his lap, rolling his shoulder slightly to hopefully relax the numb stinging sensation he felt. Getting the blood flowing helped a little. “When, well when you were about nine I think this is when the Avengers initiative was forged and you were staying with May and Ben for school.” Tony frowned slightly considering it “After that battle, I spent weeks, months having nightmares, flying into that wormhole and I’d wake up with panic attacks, I’d be crying, I’d be gasping for air and sometimes Pepper wasn’t there to help me. Sometimes I was alone. I’d think about everyone I’d be leaving behind. How I’d be leaving you and Harley all by yourself, how I’d be leaving Pepper and Happy and Rhodey. Sometimes it got worse before it got better.”   
Peter looked away as Tony attempted to catch his gaze. His dad had gone through even worse.   
“I had nightmares about Thanos too you know, before he seemed to be an issue, I saw him and I saw a pile of heroes, all dead and defeated and it would be enough to send me into the lab for days without sleep, I’d propose plans to build literal shields around the earth. I wonder if it would’ve helped. And then after all that, I did lose you. I’d have nightmares about that, I still have nightmares. I have so many nightmares about everything from when your grandparents passed away to Afghanistan to now… But I know you’re here. We lead dangerous lives and as much as I want to just wrap you up in bubble wrap and keep you locked up. I know I can’t and I’ve got to let you grow up. I want you to know Peter that Quentin wasn’t your fault and he wasn’t mine either but he is the type of person you will come across a lot. And his death isn’t on you.”   
“How did you know I was thinking that?” Peter asked with a frown, Tony casually taps his forehead before giving the teen a one sided hug.  
“I just know, also you were loud. Loud enough to wake up Morgan and a very disgruntled Harley. Couldn’t wake your mum though. Then again she’s slept through worse.”  
Peter laughs hugging the other back, going to wipe away tears with a smile although slightly disgruntled. “I love you.”   
“Yeah I know smartass.” Tony replied before running a hand through the others hair with a sigh “I love you too.” Before he coughed and groaned “Great I think I caught whatever bug you’ve got Petey.” He commented before rubbing his nose “I am so not going to hear the end of it from Cap when he gets here for Christmas. I take back loving you. I think I hate you.”   
Peter shoved the other slightly and laughed again but the hearty laugh turned into a harsh cough “Yeah whatever, shouldn’t you go make sure Harley hasn’t murdered Morgan yet? My hearing is a lot better than yours and I think I can hear them arguing.”   
“Yeah whatever, I’m going to have to ask Clint where he gets his hearing aids done, I’m getting along in age.” Tony stands up and stretches slightly before walking to the door. He looked back and smiled at the other “Night underoos, do me a favour and dream of something cool.”   
With that Tony closed the door, but instead of lingering he walked towards Morgan’s room to settle her. Tony was proud of his kids and he was sure they felt the same in return.


End file.
